'I WORSHIP THE GROUND PAUL RYAN WALKS ON'
Here is what Dick Cheney said, in public, about GOP Medicare Murderer
Paul Ryan: “I worship the ground that Paul Ryan walks on.” There, done,
confirmed: Paul Ryan is not just a creepy looking errand boy for the
Koch Brothers, because the Koch Brothers and Dick Cheney and Scott
Walker and Eric Cantor and the rest of these amoral corporate
devil-worshipers actually worship Paul Ryan, who is the Devil. This is pretty much just like in those Left Behind
books … and this might well explain why Jesus did not return as He was
scheduled to do last weekend. Paul Ryan/Satan defeated him! If the Lord
Jesus can be defeated, which in our admittedly hazy understanding of
Christianity, is basically impossible, right? But if Paul Ryan is Satan,
which was confirmed by Dick Cheney, who worships Satan, then the
Christians have to rise up and defeat Paul Ryan, so Jesus will come
back.
This is totally making sense now. Let’s see if there’s a trailer
for Left Behind: the TV Movie on YouTube, because we have a feeling there will be some instructional material within such a video.
First, though, so nobody thinks we are joshing about this, go read the actual quote in this oil industry newsletter. It’s paragraph 24, and it starts with the quote, “I worship the ground Paul Ryan walks on.”
Ergo, Paul Ryan is El Diablo, and this is exactly (probably?!) what’s in the Bible, or the Book of the End Times.
And now, our Feature Presentation. Watch closely around the :51-:54 part:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=7h2LtAG3Mkw
Who was that, right when all the good people were getting
taken and the unsaved people were freaking out? It was Paul Ryan, his
terrifyingly cold face appearing in the darkness. Look:
Here’s the screen grab:

And here’s what he looks like today, as “Paul Ryan,” the thing Dick Cheney worships:

O-kay, and we have now officially creeped ourselves out, while trying to make a Dick Cheney/Paul Ryan joke. [Fuel Fix with thanks to chascates]
WONKETTE
